Well, folks, it’s official: President Donald J. Trump has done what should’ve been done decades ago—he’s pulling the plug on the penny.
That’s right. The most useless coin in circulation (besides whatever crypto the government is trying to force on us next) is finally getting the boot. And guess what? It’s about time.
Trump took to Truth Social to declare:
“For far too long, the United States has minted pennies which literally cost us more than 2 cents. This is so wasteful! I have instructed my Secretary of the US Treasury to stop producing new pennies.”
Now, let’s talk about the hilarious irony here. Imagine you run a business—let’s say you sell hamburgers—and each hamburger costs $5 to make, but you sell them for $2. How long before you’re filing for bankruptcy and sobbing into your apron? Apparently, when it comes to the federal government, the answer is 19 straight years of doing just that.
Pennies: The Participation Trophy of Currency
Seriously, when was the last time you used a penny? You don’t feed them into vending machines, you can’t even toss them in a tip jar without looking like a cheapskate, and if you try to pay for anything with them, you’re getting dirty looks from the cashier.
People don’t use pennies—they collect them in jars, forget about them, and then maybe cash them in at a Coinstar machine, which takes a 12% fee just to turn them into real money.
And the cost to produce them? 3.69 cents per penny! That’s right—our brilliant government spends nearly four cents to make something worth one cent.
By 2024, this brilliant financial strategy had already cost taxpayers $119 million. That’s right, folks—we’re spending millions to make money that no one wants to use. Makes perfect sense, right?
Oh, and nickels aren’t much better. Each one costs 14 cents to make—but that’s a discussion for another day.
Elon Musk and the “Department of Government Efficiency” (DOGE) Weigh In
Now, here’s where it gets even funnier. You know who else has been talking about killing off the penny? Elon Musk.
That’s right, the man who reinvented electric cars, reusable rockets, and making liberals cry on Twitter is now in charge of the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE).
DOGE, apparently, has a $2 trillion spending cut initiative, and Musk has been hinting that the penny was on the chopping block for a while. Looks like Trump beat him to it.
(Also, side note—DOGE? That’s an actual department name now? Someone please tell me they picked that just to troll the left.)
“But What About Rounding?” Cue the Outrage
Of course, the moment Trump announced this common-sense move, the usual suspects started hyperventilating about how businesses will start “rounding up” prices to rip people off.
Oh, please. Canada got rid of the penny in 2012, and somehow, they survived. They round prices up or down to the nearest nickel—meaning if something costs $1.02, you pay $1.00, and if it’s $1.03, you pay $1.05. The horror!
Military bases overseas have been doing this for decades. Even back in the 1980s and ‘90s, prices at PX stores were rounded up or down to the nearest nickel—and guess what? The world kept spinning.
If you think Walmart is going to “scam” you out of a few pennies, just remember—they already price everything at $9.99 just to mess with you.
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, pennies make no cents (pun very much intended).
They cost more to make than they’re worth, they just take up space in our pockets, and even Dollar Tree doesn’t want them.
Trump’s move to end penny production isn’t just smart—it’s long overdue. Now if we can just cut the rest of Washington’s waste, we might actually get somewhere.
What do you think? Should we get rid of the nickel next, or is that too radical? Let me know in the comments below!
WE’D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS! PLEASE COMMENT BELOW.
JIMMY
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h/t: Steadfast and Loyal
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